Keeping the Faith (AKA Friday Night Confessional)

I picked up a challah from Harbord Bakery today and it’s still warm.
I got a brisket in the oven.
And Adam picked up some grape juice so Ethan and I can do the blessing over the wine tonight.

So far so good…all the boxes checked. Oh.  And one more thing:

Next week, Ethan starts Catholic school.

No matter how many boxes I tick off in the Balabusta/Yenta Playbook, I know that this decision will disappoint a lot of people in my life.

And while nothing is more uncomfortable than knowing you’ve disappointed loved ones with your life choices, at the end of the day, the only thing that really matters? I’m doing what’s right for my family.

I take comfort in the fact that Ethan will be Jewish because I’m Jewish (and it’s the law, Bubbela’s).
Of course he will come to know the customs, traditions and history of our people because I’m connecting him to a community that aligns with out interfaith values.

I’m learning to accept the fact that some boxes will go unchecked, some that I’ve outgrown and some that were just never a good fit to begin with.

But as I prepare Shabbat dinner this evening for the people I love most, I’m not keeping a tally. My heart is full.

And I’m looking forward.